This morning I was thinking about how lonely it can be as a stay-at-home mom, especially when you do not know too many people in the area. I know there are a lot of ways to meet other moms, but I tend to be a bit shy sometimes. Which brings me to something I am kicking myself for . . . When I was traveling home from Turkey on Sunday, I had a connecting flight through Munich, Germany. And as I was sitting on the bus to take me to my airplane, I looked over and saw a woman that looked extremely familiar. My brain did a quick search and came up with a name of a girl I had not seen in 17+ years. I told myself there is no way she is that person—so don’t open your mouth and ask—don’t embarrass yourself (hence the shy part of me).
Today, I was playing with my son, and I decided to try and look this person up on Facebook. No results. But of course if someone searched for me using my maiden name—I would not exist either. So, I googled her and found her new last name—and when I saw her picture on Facebook I couldn’t believe it—it was her I saw on the bus in Germany—and we live in the same city! I have some of my greatest childhood memories with this person, and I have always wondered what happened to her – we lost touch when I moved away. But thanks to social media, I can now connect with a childhood friend . . . but what are the odds that I was sitting next to her on a bus in a foreign country?? –I call it fate. Because as I mentioned earlier, I was feeling a bit lonely today, and now I might have the chance to reconnect with an old friend (who –yay—also has kids!).
Being a mom (a stay-at-home mom) can be a tough job. I have been both a working mom and stay-at-home one, and I have to say—neither is easy. All I know is that trying to find balance in life can be pretty tough. Now that I am pursuing my dreams of writing, which I never found the time to do as a teacher, I still struggle with finding actual time to sit down and work. Right now my son is taking a nap, and I feel guilty for hoping it lasts for at least two hours, because that means I have two whole hours to write. Last night I worked on my revisions for the first time since being back on vacation, but I woke up exhausted—and feeling like my work was less than par. Most likely I will delete those precious hour’ worth of work when I look back at what I wrote.
Sometimes the strength of motherhood is greater than natural laws. -Barbara Kingsolver
What will I do when my son stops taking a nap soon—or when my second baby is born in November? Gulp. I really wanted a second book written before my next baby comes, because I know that if I discovered a writer I loved—I would be bummed to discover they only had one book. So, I really want to step up and produce as much quality work as I can before my writing time decreases even more. Key word though: quality. I am not quite sure how people can produce novel after novel (six+ a year) while also having a day job?! And I am not saying their books lack quality—I just know that I COULD NOT produce quality work six times a year. Maybe once I get the swing of things I can push for three (MAYBE) . . .
Well, as I sip on my iced latte (and no—I didn’t give up caffeine because of pregnancy), I realize that I better wrap up this blog so I can look over the parts of my novel that require the delete button, because at any minute, my son will wake up!
It is perfectly okay to write garbage—as long as you edit brilliantly. – C. J. Cherryh
Btw- If you are ever on a plane, boat, or whatnot–and you think you see someone you know, speak up—you just never know!
It’s none of their business that you have to learn to write. Let them think you were born that way. – Ernest Hemingway
Really enjoyed reading your post, am a stay-home mom as well…and i know exactly what your talking about. You just nailed it.
Thank you 🙂
Reblogged this on wordspreadbymouth and commented:
A good read !
Being a member of the male species I don’t know about being a stay at home mom, but I do know about living in a place where I felt isolated. By sheer accident using Facebook on my first day I discovered there was a family reunion at a park within walking distance of my home. I had not seen any of these cousins in forty years, did not know what they would look like, but I went, turned out they had been wondering what happened to me, where I was, that sort of thing. Around a dozen or more lived in the same area as myself, so I found my family through Facebook. I hope you two can reconnect.
Thank you for sharing your story! Crazy how the world has become smaller in a sense because of social media!
It’s funny how we see people in the most unlikely places!
I can’t imagine trying to find time to write while being a stay at home mom. I only have a dog, and he’s a handful as it is with his diabetes!
I could never manage a dog – they are a lot of work too 🙂